It's not so hot here. I just think it is. I mean, it's not 120 degrees or anything. But the humidity is a real kicker. I know that everyone thinks that where they live is the hottest and most humid place on earth. You're probably wrong though. At least about the humidity part. Because I'm pretty sure the world revolves around me and that makes my humidity complaints more valid. Right guys? .... guys? Okay, let me explain. My graham crackers can bend in half without breaking . I have to keep my white paper in an airtight container because otherwise, it gets too wet to go through the printer. My framed pictures have water damage. We're talking serious humidity here people. It's no joke. The upside is that all of my cakes are real bright and shiny. So...you can add that to the "plus" column of humidity side effects. Along with...umm....well....you know, all the other things on the "plus" side. Ooh, actually I thought of another good thing ...

I have something to tell you. And its not going to be easy. I cleaned my 4 year old's bedroom for the first time in his little life. We're talking cleaning products and everything. ALL the clothes in his drawers are folded. His books are color coded and lined up according to size on his book shelf. His toys didn't exactly make it into labeled bins or anything, but we DID close the closet door. All the way. We even swept AND mopped! And then I got tired. (That was at least 10 solid minutes of cleaning.) So I sat on the couch thinking about my new scalloped cutter set that I got because Callye at The Sweet Adventures of Sugarbelle told me to do it. And I imagined all the possibilities and was seriously contemplating getting up just so I could squish them and make sure they were real. And then my little man came running into the room telling me we weren't done yet. I told him we were. He told me we weren't. It went back forth. I'm not above that. And then ...

Okay...so you're going to make a cookie banner. I mean...you are , right? Okay, look, I get it. Not everyone wants to eat their party decorations. That's cool. I totally understand. But, let's just suspend reality for a minute and pretend that everyone in the world wants to make a cookie banner. And that you care what I think. And that you are willing to let me offer you some advice. 1. The cookie recipe matters. Probably. You need a pretty sturdy cookie for this. My chocolate cookie recipe makes a soft cookie. So you should omit the shortening, roll the cookies a little thinner and bake them a little longer. Or use gingerbread. Or some fabulous vanilla cookie recipe you have that makes cookies with just a bit of a crunch. 2. Don't make heavy cookies. That's just asking for trouble. 3. Be careful where you place the holes. I used a drinking straw to poke holes in the cookie before baking them. On my test run, the ribbon broke through on two of the cookies be...

Sometimes I have what I consider to be a great idea. And then I have to make it right away. Because if I don't, I lie awake at night imagining all the other brilliant cookie makers having the EXACT SAME IDEA and doing it sooner than me and even better. Sometimes though, after I make it, I realize it wasn't actually that great of an idea. You know, like the time I made Easter Bunny ear headband cookies....no wait, I never posted that. For good reason. But this one, I'm still totally in love with. I wasn't even going to use a cutter for these cookies. I was going to take a pizza wheel and start cutting out pennant-like shapes. I was in a hurry, remember? No time to think about the fact that I own an ACTUAL pennant cutter. As it turns out...I couldn't get to my rolling pin without moving a whole bunch of cutters that needed to be put away. I realized that I was kind of tired of looking at them...and to be honest...the last time I did laundry, I lost one of them down...

Okay, so PLEASE tell me that I'm not the only person in the entire world that owns one of these cases of endless markers. I just love looking at it. I love the colors. And I love the possibilities. And I almost never use the markers because I absolutely hate that the color it draws is NEVER the color on the outside. AND you can only use it about 3 times before it completely runs dry in the middle of whatever necessary and very important project you happen to be working on at the time. But I can't give up on them. You just don't give up on love, you know? As it turns out, I have found a wonderful place in my heart for these markers. I use them to help me make color shading  choices for my cookies. Umm, I don't know about anyone else, but I have maybe, more than once, ruined a batch of icing by mixing and mixing and trying to figure out exactly which shades go best together and still not making it all work out in my head, or obviously in the bowls of icing staring at me...

 You know that "average American" they are always talking about? That's me. I know. It's crazy. I'm super famous. But don't worry, I haven't let it go to my head or anything. I still make my kids dinner and I only pretend that I'm incapable of cleaning bathrooms some of the time. Okay, most of the time. But, I swear my husband actually really likes cleaning bathrooms. He doesn't hate it at all. I know. I'm not sure I believe him either. But MAYBE he's just so psyched out of his mind to be married to someone so incredibly average as me that he gets confused sometimes and thinks that we are talking about rock climbing instead of cleaning. There is no way to be sure, really. ANYWAY...here I am. Average beyond belief. Average height - 5 feet 4 inches.   CHECK. Average weight   for my incredibly average height  --- umm, we'll come back to this one . Average time on phone calls in a day - .09 hours -- CHECK. (honestly though -- Who PA...

Hey guys. I have an idea. Let's all pretend that my card reader DIDN'T stop working. And that I didn't have to resort to my less-than-favorite camera. And let's pretend that we all LOVE these pictures. Sound good? Yeah, it's not really working for me either. Maybe if I get in real, real close and kind of blur things... And if you squint a little and tilt your head.... anything? No? That's okay. I know a guy who knows a guy who might know of a store in Korea that sells what I need. I have a little confession. I have never actually seen one of these game controllers in real life. Is that okay to say out loud? ( Game people -- don't hate me. I did grow up with an Atari, so that makes me kind of cool again, right? ) In case you are like me...this is an xbox controller. But not the black kind. The other kind. You know...the white kind.

Once upon a time there was a little boy and his little sister. And they lived in a town with NO swing set. And you can't tell, but this made them sad. Real, real sad. And they dreamed and dreamed of a playground that would have a swing set and a slide and maybe some kind of yellow animal springy thing. And then one day it fell magically out of the sky and the little boy and the little girl were SUPER happy.   (only that's not exactly true. A ton of people did a ton of work to make it happen.) And all the kids in town came to play at the brand new playground. And they were so happy they never wanted to leave even though there must have been some weird thing in the water that made them all look exactly the same even though they weren't even related. Except, you know, the little boy and his little sister. They were, in fact, related.

I'm probably only going to say this once. (today) My GOODNESS -- look how cool this cake is! And I can say that, even though I made it, because its all buttercream. (Except the little congratulations banner at the bottom...but let's not be so picky, shall we?) And buttercream and I aren't exactly best-friends-forever-sleep-over-at-each-others'-houses-on-the-weekend type of friends. We are more like people-that- have-a-mutual-friend-and-we-would-only-be-friends-with-each-other-if-that-mutual-friend-was-dying-and-needed-us-desperately-to-team-up-and-steal-the-top-secret-antidote-to-stay-alive kind of friends. So, you know, this cake is basically never going to happen again. Oh, and in case you are wondering...this is a giant replica of a warrant officer insignia in the US army. And in case you are still wondering...insignia means badge or distinguishing mark. And in case that didn't clear things up either... " The Army Warrant Officer is an adaptive techni...

  In case you are not from the United States and are wondering about this whole "Independence Day" thing...let me explain it real quick. Way back around a jillion years ago in 1776 some people were living in North America from Britain. And Britain was being all mean to them, making them mow their lawns and not even giving them popsicles when it was hot outside. And the people in North America were living in wood houses and the people in Britain had big old palaces and swimming pools and stuff, so they could certainly have spared a popsicle or two. Anyway...the "Colonials" ( just a big word meaning poor people that live in wood houses and don't get to make their own rules ) decided they didn't want to play that game anymore. So they told everyone in Britain that they quit. And the people in Britain said "Oh, no you don't." And the Colonials said, "Oh, yes we do." And then there were fireworks and hot dogs and a watermelon seed spitting...