Easy Outline Pumpkins

I think I have a defective "dress gene." I hate wearing dresses. There. I said it out loud. It is true and I am no longer ashamed to admit it.

 My daughter will choose to wear a dress every time she is given the chance. She even chooses dresses instead of pajamas if we give her the choice. We don't give her that choice anymore. She likes to dance and spin around and watch her dress get all flowy and girly and spinny-outy around her. She is two. And she chooses dresses. It's like she's a grown-up. She's not, by the way. Weren't you listening? I just told you she is two.

My neighbors really are grown ups though. Actual lawn mowing, car driving, house painting, and going to the bank type grown-ups. And they are not defective. They wear dresses all the time. ALL. THE. TIME. It's quite amazing really, to watch them work a dress into every occasion. Grocery shopping? Check. Going to lunch? Check. Phone plan-re charging and hair cut getting? Check-check. WALKING THE DOG? Checkity check. I told you they were amazing. Also, there are people I am related to that wear dresses and then just hang out on the couch, painting their toenails. ON THE COUCH, I tell you. In a dress.

I don't do that. Why wear a dress when you can wear yoga pants? That's my motto. Except...sometimes you can't wear yoga pants. Maybe I need some kind of "Dresses and YOU -- What you need to know to love them like every other female on the planet" type class. Do you think they offer them at community centers? Am I really such an oddity that they don't have classes like that in every town? Maybe I could mail-order something? I feel like there is this big "Why dresses are FANTASTIC" secret that nobody wants to tell me. Seriously, if there is, then you could tell me. I wouldn't be mad.

Whoa. I just fell asleep writing my own blog post. I have hit a new low of interestingness. This pretty much proves my point that dresses are weird. I'm just going to show you how I outlined these cookies now and call it a day.

Like that. Outline the sides using thick orange icing and a #3 tip. Add some swoopy-uppy lines and some swoopy-downy lines. Let it dry for 30 minutes and then flood the middle part with a flood consistency icing and add a stem. Done. Let it dry overnight and then add some kind of face that you adore and love and want to look at every day of your life until you eat it.

I'm seriously going to go to sleep in like 4 minutes. (I live on the other side of the world. I can totally do that.) Don't get all crazy and start leaving comments about how weird I am because I don't like dresses, okay? If there is some huge embarrassing typo, on the other hand...go ahead and get that out of your system. I'm cool with that.

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