I have a confession to make. (I know. Always with the confessions.)
I haven't made cookies in nearly 3 weeks. But that's not the worst part. The worst part was that I didn't even want to make cookies. Go ahead and shun me now. It's cool. I've been expecting it.
See, I've been real, real sick. I don't usually get sick. Ever. But this time I did. And I was sick for kind of a long time. And I was super annoying to be around. But it wasn't my fault. I mean, I don't have much practice being sick. I don't know how to handle it. I panicked and went for annoying. I can't be judged on the same terms as more experienced sick people. Anyway... about the same day that my husband was getting ready to check into a hotel room with our 3 small children just to get away from me...I miraculously started feeling better. Seriously though, I wasn't faking it. Who fakes not wanting to make cookies?!
I was going to tell you all the funny stories from those weeks I was sick to make up for not posting. But then I realized that there isn't anything funny about being sick and annoying. So I'll just tell you this super embarrassing story instead. Get ready. It's a good one.
When I was 12-ish years of age, I didn't like water. Actually, that is an understatement. I hated it. I was terrified of it. And my mother made me take swimming lessons anyway. Clearly, she did not understand that water was my arch-nemesis. I could DIE and she would be calmly sitting by the side of the pool waiting for those treacherous twenty minutes to expire. I actually worked myself up over the lessons to the point where my parents took me to a doctor and had me checked out for asthma because of all the quick, raspy, back of the throat breathing going on at the side of the pool. (I kid you not. I still remember the look on that doctor's face as he tried to explain to my parents that I was a complete pansy. Except I think he called it something more like "anxiety induced breathing issues.")
I'd like to tell you that after weeks and weeks of swimming lessons that things got better. I'd like to tell you that I eventually put my head underwater without crying and seeing my life flash before my very eyes. I would also like to tell you that I am currently a millionaire vacationing in Fiji, but none of those things would be true. In fact...we have yet to get to the most embarrassing part of this story. The very last day of swim lessons was kind of a play day. My teacher said it would be fun. And THEN she said it would be in the deep pool. The TWENTY FOOT DEEP pool. And that I had to jump off the low-dive because it would be fun. I told her it wouldn't be fun at all.
I don't know what in the previous 6 weeks of swim lessons gave her any indication that I would be capable of doing something like that without making a scene and possibly passing out. She didn't care. Actually, now that I think about it...it might have been revenge for those previous 6 weeks of swim lessons. She got in the pool and told me that she would be right there, that all I had to do was jump to her and she would catch me and help me swim to the side of the pool. I didn't care what she said anymore. I was standing on the edge of the low dive looking at twenty feet of water below me and I got this great idea. I sat down on the low dive. My feet could almost touch the water. I started breathing again. And then I got an even better idea. I slowly inched my lower half off of the low dive while still clinging to the board with my arms. Literally, inch by inch, I eased into the water until my teacher grabbed on to me and told me to let go of the board.
I think that might have been the point where she gave up on me because she finally let me get out and go get dressed even though everyone else had to stay and have fun in the deep pool. I think this story might actually be more embarrassing for my mom because after that she said I didn't have to take swim lessons anymore. (For the record -- I actually ended up becoming a lifeguard and then a white water rafting guide. So.... it would be safe to say that water and I have had a nice chat and worked out our differences. )
These cookies have absolutely nothing to do with this post. But I don't care because they made me happy. You can't really go wrong with happy sunshine, can you?